You can't be serious....

So yes, I acknowledge I have been really down, more than usual.
I also appreciate the folks who've been kind enough to send me notes of concern- thank you
they really mean a lot to me !

This weekend was tough, Adam and Jenny had a going away party, which really made things
hit home. Sunday I picked up cleaning supplies and packing material and I tried to get a start on things.
It was just so hard, sitting there and wonder do I need that or should I throw it away.
After several hours, I threw out a ton, but saw it didn't even make a dent.

Folks that know me, know where I work and have seen the news... it's ain't good, 10% reduction in staff, no merit increases (not even cost of living), oh and what wasn't mentioned in the news, no bonuses...
Several folks were saying "what were you expecting? at least we have a job" And I can appreciate that perspective. It's a tough time, but we made substantial amounts of profit, the company as a whole just
missed the Wall st. predicted growth.. So why weren't the bonuses just decreased?? We certainly weren't short of cash. My group along with many others hit and exceeded our numbers. But the company as a whole, just didn't make "enough profit"

With out that money, I am having to pull out a calculator and try and figure out how to make up for it. I'll be ok, but it's just sooo going to be difficult as I'm going to need so much cash up front, to pay off my car, and get it back once I sell it again. Then pay for scooters transport, my transport and shipping fees, and then apartment fees, and god knows what else to get set up.

Oh and yeah, I might need a job by then too.... The stress has been horrible, this has to go down as my worst year ever. What else can go wrong :-(

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